Cupid ain’t got nothin’ on my daughter

So, the first thing I’ve done this morning is help Linnae load her projectile shooter thingy she made at Explora yesterday so that she could shoot it down the stairs. They were studying transfer of energy, I think.

The smug victory in her voice as her device works is worth every penny we pay for those classes. She also made one for each of us because you never know when you might need a small projectile shooter. 😉

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Cupid’s bow ain’t got nothin’ on this rubber band powered shooter. His aim might be better but she’s working on it 😉

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The path to…

My husband and I were discussing how miserable our older daughter is in her pregnancy… I was going to try to articulate how pregnancy is truly something that proves a woman’s inner strength to herself and I commented:

“To me, pregnancy is -”

“A keyword for MADNESS!” interjected our seven year old, with fervent sincerety…

Apparently she misses nothing.

Comparative Religion, Lotaburger Style

Yesterday I heard the most interesting conversation between two workers at Lotaburger.

The girl was trying to explain Ash Wednesday to someone who didn’t grow up here in New Mexico.

Girl, perplexed: “Wait, you never heard of the ‘Catho-leek?'”

Guy, helpfully:  “Naw, man, when I first moved here and saw that sh** on people’s heads I was all like, what the f**?! What is this sh** on their heads?”

Girl, still perplexed: “Really? You never heard of the Catho-leek?”

Guy: “No, we never heard of the ‘Catho-leek’ (chuckles, so I guess he is poking fun at her pronunciation). Seriously though, where I grew up, man, we would walk around the village and ring a big ol’ bell. It was cool, all old and sh**. Like from when the English came. A big ol’ heavy a** bell. And then you could say the name of your family members who were gone and stuff but not the rest of the year. We would eat, too. It was like your day of the dead, here. But not that stuff on your head and sh**.”

Girl, pondering: “Well, we like can’t eat meat on Fridays and stuff. But like, I can eat fish then. And I have to give stuff up. Because that’s what we do.”

Guy: “That’s cool, I can respect that. But you should just say you’re vegetarian, man. It’s less complicated.”

And that, my friends, is how these conversations should go.

Just looking, thanks

Sent The Yngrdottr down to the laundry room to get her clean clothes but I *said* “go down to the laundry basket and see if you have clean clothes in there.” So naturally she bebops back up and goes about her business. I said, wait, you didn’t have any clean laundry to put away? Of course she replied with “Ooooh, I thought you meant just LOOK.”

Hasty pudding!

Spoiler: this has nothing to do with pudding.

“Oh Lord, this child. She’s dragging her feet getting ready for bed and it’s already an hour late because we watched a movie.. I tell her “just because you choose to ignore them, the rules doesn’t change.”

She literally creeps into the bathroom at a snail’s pace to brush her teeth and I snap “come on, hurry up!” to which she replies, huffily: “don’t be so hasty!””

People wonder why having children ages you… 🙂

We are rich!

On our way to Thrift Town today, Linnae asked if we are rich.

Of course we are. And we have plenty of money for the things we need, plus some, too. If we start thinking of all the things that we want and can’t get, we aren’t rich anymore and we have to take a step back and figure out what we are doing wrong.

She seemed well satisfied with that idea.

Good.

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Self Confidence

I have discussed this before but need to remind myself again. A friend posted a cute photo of himself in middle school, teasing himself about being nerdy. As he is successful both personally and professionally, it got me started thinking about the notions we carry around from adolescence.

Adolescence is recognized as a pivotal point in our social development. It’s when every brain cell you have is disrupted in its normal functioning by a constant bath of ravening hormones (did she say ‘bath’? People are nekkid in baths! Delicious thought segue to nekkid bath scenes…).

You are somehow supposed to grasp algebra, become a better human being, and religiously remember your retainer while being utterly distracted by thoughts of soft fuzzy sweaters and devils in blue jeans. It’s also when you are forming social groups and behaviors that will see you through to adulthood. Most of us just tried to fit in with whatever our chosen group was – or our default group of fringe folks who didn’t fit in with the other groups. Not even fitting in with the fringe is also tremendously painful.

In my thirties I decided to quit trying so hard to make myself fit in and make friends and concentrated on surrounding myself not just with people I wanted to be like (although there are people I would still like to emulate) but with people who simply *liked me* as I was. My life still has ups and downs, of course, but overall has been on a positive trend since then. The downs are more obviously from some unknown biochemical cause rather than masked by personal dilemmas. Can’t do anything about the rain but hunker down and wait it out, so to speak. Much better than flailing around in the ditch you fell in from living a harmful lifestyle and doing incredibly stupid things to yourself.

I try to welcome those who welcome me and shrug off those who don’t. *Try*. When I find myself slipping back into the old pattern of “likemepickmelikemeplease” I also try to back off. That is tremendously difficult. We are conditioned to play Red Rover from childhood, to march in step or be trampled, to seek approval and acceptance from our peers.

Raising the bar for who you consider to be your peers is a good first step. Not by elitism, but by compassion. Who has walked a hard path and still turned to help the next person along? Who knows what that ditch is like? If those folks look you in the eye and give you a nod, that means far, far more than getting to sit at the lunch table with the team leader or being invited to a sportsing watching party on payday and knocking back a few beers.

I still make my jokes about hairy legs and whatnot, but not to get people to accept my personal preferences, merely to let them know that I am indeed aware of my differences and they can relax and accept them, too. It’s like confronting a bully. Once you establish the boundaries of your self-confidence, others will adjust. Obviously this is tremendously difficult as well.

Here’s to middle age and accepting oneself far, far more easily than in adolescence! Here’s to going from fighting who your parents think you should be to striving to be the person your pets think you are!  Here’s to waking up with yourself, as Billy Joel put it, and being ok with that. No, seriously. Think about it.

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