Today I Discovered

I have that creeping crud cold that’s going around. You know, the one that teases you by letting up a little then slams you back down like Jesse Ventura shopping for folding chairs…

So I was reading the mentholatum jar as I was slathering it on my chest between wheezing coughs and discovered that THERE IS NO MENTION OF COUGHS on the directions. It is apparently a topical analgesic for muscle aches etc.

I had no idea, I think we only ever used it for coughs and congestion. Now I understand why people would even remotely think it was appropriate to use on a toothache. Except for the being made out of petrolatum part. Yuck. Decomposed, metamorphosised prehistoric plant and animal muck by-product gooped all over your tooth. Mmmm, tasty…

Anyway, quit laughing at me. Obviously I don’t know everything and this realization has crushed my tender soul so I’m a bit sensitive about it… Analgesic. Hm.

Posted from WordPress for Android


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